❝ My ambition is handicapped by my laziness.

Charles Bukowski 


I just went to the forest behind my house to collect moss and all of the sudden 7 kitties surrounded me! They were all looking at what I was doing, so cute!

And then I went deeper into the forest and this one kitty kept following me wherever I went. I love cats so much!!  


today i saw a cat breastfeeding her cutie little babies and i got emotional ha.

i love cats so much, and that cat mom is the best, she had 6 kitties with only 5/6 months old. even thought she is thin and somewhat weak, she’s still feeding them and taking care of them. ha i love them so much  ⊱◑ω⊰ 

❝ One writes of scars healed, a loose parallel to the pathology of the skin, but there is no such thing in the life of an individual. There are open wounds, shrunk sometimes to the size of a pin-prick but wounds still. The marks of suffering are more comparable to the loss of a finger, or of the sight of an eye. We may not miss them, either, for one minute in a year, but if we should there is nothing to be done about it.

—  F. Scott Fitzgerald, Tender Is the Night


Finally putting my laziness aside and starting to read “Anti-Freud”.

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Anonymous: what do you think is the meaning of life? what gives you hope?

As a nihilist I don’t believe life has a meaning. We are here because of a mere coincidence. I despise people who say happiness is our hope and the goal in our existence. I mean, happiness is really vague, it depends on the type of person you are. If you’re bad, making people feel bad as well can make you feel happy, so, that’s not the way you wanna live your life. Bah, anyway this is just too complex to explain in one ask.

What gives me hope? Strong feelings such as love and pain. And I try to think that our society will change for the better…


It’s too easy to get lost in myself. Sometimes I still forget to come up for air.


currently watching mean girls bc it’s such an amusing film haha


I think my life now has been reduced to simple ephemeral moments. When I take a long warm bath with candles with silence as a soundtrack, when I wrap myself in the sheets in the morning thinking I can sleep for more five minutes, when I eat my favourite cookies, when I read my favourite authors in bed with the window open…

Life is reduced to this. This nostalgic simple endlessly happy moments. I don’t believe in happiness as the long lasting emotion when people feel fulfilled. I’ll never be fulfilled or accomplished… ever. Happiness is in seconds.

(Source: emsangue)


small talk is the worst

tell me your darkest secrets or fuck off

  • Me: Wow, today is such a lovely day to avoid all human contact and remain in the comfort of my own loneliness and sorrows of not having a social life thus maintaining my solitude as I surf the web.

the high point of my day is eating marshmallows


Today I went to the Great Wall of China with my sister and two american guys. I really loved the trip and such, but one thing that annoyed me was the fact that the two guys were always talking to me like I was a kid. I’m 18 you assholes, I’m not 6. Talking about alcohol and referring it as “juice” and not telling things because in your mind I must be “too young” is just a pretty lame and stupid thing to do, tbh.

I guess I’m really tired of people misjudging me and misunderstanding my personality. I mean, I’m 100 percent sure that people think I’m no fun at all, that I’m serious and don’t party/ don’t know how to and stuff like that. After a while I find it really frustrating that people, and I mean ALL of them, are constantly label MY attitudes and MY silence for unpleasantness, seriousness and dullness.

I’m shy, I don’t talk much so I rather listen to people and watch their movements while they interact. I hate sharing MY things with strangers/ friends of peers, and period! Don’t fucking start to define the way I am, because you don’t fucking know how I am.

too depressed to like you 5:02